No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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