Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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