Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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