What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize