im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Randomize
