why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love