is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I touched a dick in church today
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Randomize