Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
