So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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