I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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