I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
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Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
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This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
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