'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Hippo gnu deer
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize