In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
