She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
there is puke in my bra ... again
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