woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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