Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize