oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
this just has baby written all over it
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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