i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
Randomize
