did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
