I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
