that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
