I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
His hands were made for my vagina.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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