I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize