just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize