just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
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