She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
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