i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize