Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
