Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Randomize
