wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
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