Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
