i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
