Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
