Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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