i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
