how hairy? two words: wookie tits
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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