Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
