he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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