Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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