And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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