I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
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