this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Just pee around me
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
