Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
