I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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