There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
