i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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