your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
grandma shit on top of the toilet
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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