Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
