You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
how drunk are you?
Several
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
