Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
