My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize