David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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